Stupid Stories

Robocop Coming To A Town Near You, If You Live In Detroit Michigan!

This is my kind of conspiracy theory! I know it's not in the news too much anymore, but I was
hearing a lot about the Detriot bankruptcy. So as logic could dictate, if the city's broke, the
people are broke along with the city. I have had a few friends from Detroit, Red Wings fans (poor
bastards), tell me that there are two types of people in Detroit, the people who are doing really well
and the people who are scraping by. I think that's why it's so confusing where Eminem came from... I'm
not the only one that thinks that - seen Scary Movie IV? "That's it! I quit!". When I say "Mali", you
say "bu!". But I digress...

As bad economy does and will do to any metropolitan area, the rich will get poor and the poor will get
poorer. Early in the Detroits Chapter 11 talks, I started seeing strange coincidences with a fine
featured film from 1987 by the name of ROBOCOP!!!

First read the plot of the 1987 film:

The film is set in a near future in Old Detroit, Michigan. Violent crime is out of control,
and the city is in financial ruin. The city government contracts the megacorporation (OCP) to fund
and operate the police force, in effect privatizing it. OCP is not interested in rebuilding "Old Detroit"
but rather replacing it with a modern settlement called "Delta City". Before construction can begin,
however, OCP needs to end crime in the city, but knows it can't rely on an already undermanned police
department whose officers are contemplating going on strike.

Got that? So in October of LAST year, this was said by the real Detroit Police Officer's Association:

"Detroit is America's most violent city, its homicide rate is the highest in the country and yet the Detroit Police Department is grossly understaffed..."

...AND...

"Officers are leaving simply because they can't afford to stay in Detroit and work 12 hour shifts for what they are getting paid..."

Rich vs. Poor

Is it just me or is it blatantly obvious that the richie riches of Detroit, instead of tackling the
'worst per-capita crime rate in the country' pay $444 million dollars so the freakin' Red Wings have a
new place to play?! What's wrong with Joe Louis? Heck I'd still go to [Insert Airline Name]
Arena to watch the Coyotes if I still could. But I suppose if you lost the Red Wings, all you'd
really have left is Lee Iacocca.. At least he knows how to stay superdy duperdy rich after a
bankruptcy - right, Chrysler?

Detroit, the Police State

On a hunch I started googling around the interwebs and ran across this corporate security firm just
outside of Detroit. It's vagueness has me raise an eyebrow about their intentions. The name of the
security corporation... "Security Corporation". Reminds me of a Chinese restaurant near where I live
in Gilbert called "Chinese Restaurant". Which, I think is a front for something too. How couldn't you think that,
right? On the website for "Security Corporation", under services, they list technology partners that
include Honeywell, GE, and Bosch - just the kind of friends you'd need to start building cyborgs, right?

Logo of Omnicorp from Robocop

Logo of "Security Corporation"

Robots and Michigan

Not enough? Check this out.. Macomb county, which is bordered by Detriot by 8 Mile Road, has grants and
participation to the tune of $231,000.00 from the Michigan Economic Development Corp. and the Department of Planning and Economic
Development of Macomb county to build ROBOTS!!! I kid you not!!

Macomb County has a grant from the Michigan Economic Development Corp. to expand some of its local initiatives courting the defense industry into a statewide effort and to develop a robotics cluster.

They are making defense robots for Detroit!!

Public Preparedness

Warning: There's a spolier two paragraphs down if you want to see the new Into Darkness Star Trek moive, but it is pertinent to my case.

What's the best way to control the masses these days? Entertainment.. People like having a good time,
right? Since the newer generation probably would not make the connection if Detroit started unleashing
robots to police thier people from the 26 year old movie, why not come out with a new one to prepare
their mushy minds for what's to come - why not make another movie, you ask? Bam.. Robocop 2014.

Sure, but Robocop was a good guy. Well, that's what we'd like to remember, but I think the
government has a different idea. Just as I thought maybe everything is okay and maybe I'm going a
little overboard on this realization of robotic policing in Rock City, enter Peter Weller. I just
rented the new Star Trek movie, and low and behold, who portrays the corrupt, greedy, power hungry
super bad guy, but yours truly, Peter Weller, the original actor from Robocop! I don't know about
you, but my opinion of Robocop is forever tainted! Important Note! Not only does Peter Weller play
a bad guy, but he plays the main good guy... who happens to be a bad guy!!! Maybe he should run for office. Scared yet?!

Coincidences? I think not!

Recap

Let's go through the major plot points of robocop and it's correlation to reality, shall we?

• Detroit - a city in financial crisis Check


• Corruption and financial mismanagement Yup


• Crime out of control with bad guys Check, called it a "war zone"


• Corporate security most likely concerned more with profit than security Booya


• Money spent to further robotic research and development Not just robots, friends, but "defense" robots


• Doing the math You are!

Just like any good conspiracy theory, I have no real concrete evidence and rely on you to not look up anything
and just take the various facts from the interweb that I have found and come to a similar conclusion.
Call it crazy rantings of a lunatic, but you'll remember me when the private police force
comes knocking on your door! With that in mind, we together can get the word out that the robots are coming!

The robots are coming!!

THE ROBOTS ARE COMING!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAAAA!

Sources

http://detroit.cbslocal.com/2012/10/06/enter-at-your-own-risk-police-union-says-war-like-detroit-is-unsafe-for-visitors/

http://money.cnn.com/2013/07/26/news/economy/detroit-bankruptcy-arena/

http://robocop.wikia.com/wiki/RoboCop_%281987_film%29

http://securitycorp.com/service/

http://www.omnicorp.com/products/

http://www.crainsdetroit.com/article/20130529/NEWS/130529867/macomb-defense-and-robotics-push-goes-statewide

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/tag/detroit-crime-rate

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Detroit

http://washingtonexaminer.com/despite-bankruptcy-crony-capitalism-alive-and-well-with-detroits-new-red-wings-arena/article/2534196

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1234721/

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