To try to get the real feeling of how I read the emails, I put these in gmail format. You can click the messages to open them up:
Hello, I need you to run a quick task. I need you to get our clients some gift cards.
Let me know if you can so I can provide you with the details.
What I need is Google Play Gift Card of $200 face value. I need 5 of the card. That's $1000 total. You can also get it in lower denominations. You can get them in 50s and 100s. You will be reimbursed.
Get the physical cards at the store, scratch the back out and Email me pictures of the codes.
You can also get Steam Wallet Gift Cards as an alternative.
But Doug, who are they for? Wouldn't it be easier if I just bring the gift cards to the people? We're all in the same building.
I am very busy right now. Do as you have been told, I will brief you later.
I just went to your office and you PRETENDED like you have no idea what you're talking about?? Are the gift cards for those guys that were in your office? What kind of game are you playing? Do you want the cards or not?
Yes, do as you have been told and send the pictures.
I will brief you later.
Oh okay. Must be a surprise. So, it's Chester, Bill and your wife. Is it okay if I use the corporate credit card? Last time I used mine like you told me to, accounting said they couldn't reimburse me. I'm still trying to get that figured out. If you could help with that that would be great. Let me know if I can use the corporate card this time.
Okay Doug, I got the cards at lunchtime. The quickequick was out of Google Play cards and I know how much Chestr and Bill like coffee so I put the money on starbucks cards instead. Here's the picture.
Hello, are you there?
What the hell do you want, Doug!? I didn't even know if I should answer this email but after a month of stewing on it and being able to calm down, I guess I can. You left things pretty tenuous when you let me go. I JUST DID WHAT I WAS TOLD AND GOT THE STUPID GIFT CARDS!! Pretty funny you gave them to me as my "severance package". I don't tdrink coffee!! What the hell am I going to do withe them now!? I suppose YOU want them now. Figures you'd want them back. What do you want me to do with them?
I guess I made a mistake letting you go, scratch out the codes and email me clear pictures of the codes.
We will talk about welcoming you back.
I regret to inform you that I lost the Starbucks cards. I think I may have left them in my desk. If you could check it would make me feel better. Or email me the corporate card number and I’ll order them again if it’s not too late.
Doug, did you find theM?
No i never did. You sent nothing to me
That's not entirely true. I sent the pictures of the cards they just didn't have the codes scratched off. But I was asking you to check my desk. I can't get to it.. Remember? You fired me????????? Check my desk, that's where the cards are I'm sure of it
No, I looked and I didn't get them.
Oh crap! I found them in the box when I packed my desk. I'll get a picture to you if you promise I can have my job back. okay?
Yes, you have your job back.
Oh thank you Doug!! What a relief! I'll get those pictures to you today. I was really busy with my dog. You remember my dog, Chestnut? You met her when I got her as a puppy. That was a long time ago now though. REminds me of how long I worked for you. Anyway Chestnut and I were on a walk in the park near my house when she saw a cat and the leash slipped out of my hand! Chestnut chased the cat and I was chasing Chestnut while she was barking and barking. I was like Chestnut no! but she didn't listen. She really likes chasing cats. But then that cat ran onto the busy street, over by 78th and Chestnut ran into traffic. She was almost hit by a car, but made it across the street. I had to wait for the traffic to clear and the people to stop being so mad. They honked so much! Anyway, on the other side of the road Chestnut cut her paw on a broken bottle that was in the gutter or seomthign. She was yelping and limping a lot so I ran across the street and picked her up and took her to the vet. This week we've been in and out of the vet and her paws doing much better but now I have these vet bills. Since I have my job back, can you maybe advance me like $40? You can take it out of my next check. Okay? Chestnut thanks you! If you could get that to me today that would help.
I need the cards
I need 40 bucks
Hey Doug, So my buddy Josh lent me the $40 to take care of Chestnut's paw thank goodness. I went into the office and put the cards on your desk so you should be good to go. There's someone sitting at my old desk now, so I just took the office next to yours. Is that cool?
You haven't spoken to me in 8 days even though I work in the office right next to you!! What did you want me to do? Should I get different gift cards? I still don't understand what you need them for.
Can you go get different gift cards now?
Sure, I called Sue and she gave me the credit card number so I'll go get some more.
Hi, Here's the pictures. I've been swamped with all the work I've been getting. Thanks for letting me have my job back. HR was a bit confused and it's been a few weeks now and I haven't gotten a paycheck. Any chance you can talk to them about that?
Anyway I had to take the pictures at the dog park with Chestnut. She's doing so much better now the cut on her paw healed up. I got a couple pictures of her with the cards from the dog park. She's running away with my water bottle and in the last one she's acting like a boy dog!!! She's such a scamp!!
This is way nice but at the same time you have sent absolutely nothing to me as the codes are not visible at all. Take the pictures again of the codes and have them resent, then i can clarify with HR.
Did you ever get the cards I sent you ? I mailed them to your house. It's a lot of money I would think I'd at least get a thank you.